Let us go then, you and I

A wishlist of books 

for the summer & years to come

A Widow for One Year - John Irving

A Marriage Plot - Jeffrey Eugenides

Milkweed - Jerry Spinelli

Selected Poems by T.S. Eliot - T.S. Eliot

The Diving Bell & The Butterfly - Jean Dominique Bauby

Schindler's Ark - Thomas Keneally

The History of Love - Nicole Krauss

We Bought a Zoo - Benjamin Mee

Delicacy - David Foenkinos

Bel Ami - Guy De Maupassant

Leaves of Grass - Walt Whitman

The Whores Asylum - Katy Darby

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest - Ken Kesey

We Need to Talk About Kevin - Lionel Shriver

All is Song - Samantha Harvey

The Paris Wife - Paula McLain

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My room is turning into some sort of wreckage site; I've run out of shelves, and floor. 

Clandestine places & little things

Once or twice

I have been tempted

on occasion 

to run away from my love of the sea

A love that could ruin me

Out of salt

and black ink

He was borne

So we waltz with a heavy step

with rosebuds peeking out beneath my dress

Oh the confidence of young lovers

But now 

the light in your eyes is dying

and the day has come

where I no longer yearn, 

skin of skin

The day has come

where the man of steel and wood

has become sparse

and silver doorknobs appear

where his eyes once were

So I sit deep in forest crevices

at the edges of cliffs,

and dream of the days

with kisses of melted butter

and unimportant things

Yet I feel less like myself than ever

The air smells of tang and despair

For it was I, who first loved you

from across the sea

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It's easy to feel insignificant. Sometimes, when I'm sitting at a cafe and having a perfectly amiable conversation with a friend about literature or films, I get this jolt of fear. I suddenly think of all the thoughts and conversations I've ever had, things I had thought were profound and original, and how they have all already happened. Doesn't it scare you tremendously? That your every blossoming epiphany about life and its pinnacle events have already taken place somewhere in time or space, recorded in a book of sorts. Who are we then, if not vessels to hold the recycled thoughts and experiences of greater people? Who are we, if not brilliant? 

It makes me wonder... How does one cope with the feeling of insignificance? We bake cupcakes & take long walks & write long, sad poems & read old novels who have become friends & drink mug after mug after mug of tea. We do extraordinarily, ordinary things. We do ordinary things, because often, it is the ordinary things that make us happy. And I've come to realise that in the end, one's happiness is truly the only thing that matters. 

Lent: Day 18

It's been a tough eighteen days, ya'll. It's not easy to give up two meals a day, especially on sixteen-hour school days that is full of commuting, essay-writing and the like. But this fast has been wonderful; somehow I've managed to keep the intense hunger at bay and use the extra hours for QT, which has been rewarding for the soul.

Food-wise: I've found that stuffing your face with carbs and protein during that singular meal will leave one nauseated and sickly for the rest of the night. I've not a fan of vegetables or salads, but I've been eating a lot of this dish lately for that very reason. 

It was 'created' a couple of months ago, from a box of almost-stale swiss mushrooms and a box of pea sprouts. The tomato pipérade used in this dish involves a whole lot of simmering and reducing, so pasta sauce does just fine! This warm salad tastes better if left to stand for a couple of hours.The salad is best served with toasted slices of rustic bread with a dry crumb, to eat with the leftover olive oil and vinaigrette. 

Pea Sprout & Zucchini Salad

Ingredients

1 medium/large zucchini

20 red cherry tomatoes

25 medium swiss brown mushrooms

75g of fresh pea sprouts

2 cloves of garlic

Extra Virgin olive oil

White wine vinegar 

Tomato pipérade / pasta sauce (Prego)

Fresh & dried basil

1 bay leaf

A few sprigs of fresh thyme

Salt & Pepper

1. Prep: Slice the zucchini into half-inch thick crescents. Then, halve the cherry tomatoes (do not throw them in whole. Cutting them into half means that the dish will be more flavourful from the pulp inside). Chop the cloves of garlic finely.Take the stalks off the mushrooms and slice them thinly. Do not be surprised by the quantity of the mushrooms; the entire mound will reduce in size by at least half after sauteing and reducing.

2. First, heat a good lug of olive oil in a large skillet (at least 12 inches in diameter) at medium heat. Add in the zucchini and sauté for about 4 - 5 minutes, stirring and flipping the slices constantly. 

3. When the zucchini is just about to turn tender, throw in majority of the pea sprouts. Stir-fry for about 2 - 3 minutes

4. Add in the tomatoes, basil, thyme, bay leaf and a heaped tablespoonful of tomato pipérade / good-quality pasta sauce (Prego or Dei Fratelli). Stir to mix everything. Reduce heat to low and cover with lid, allowing the flavours to meld for a few more minutes. Put the vegetables aside.

5. Add more olive oil and the chopped garlic on the skillet on medium heat, adding a tablespoon of olive oil if necessary. Sauté mushrooms for about 5 - 7 minutes. Sprinkle with sea salt and freshly grated black pepper. Cover with lid, and let the mushrooms cook under low heat for another 3 minutes.

6. Take off lid and combine mushrooms with the vegetables. Add a good splash of white wine vinegar and more olive oil for dressing.

7. Add a generous dash of salt (1/3 table spoon) and more pepper. Adjust according to taste. Give the remaining pea sprouts a quick fry in the pan (not till limp) and place on top of the entire salad for garnish. Remove bay leaf. 

Serve with toasted focaccia or ciabatta slices 

Boy Lilikoi

And then I heard youYou made me long forTo be a part ofSomething that I can't seeA life that is beyondSomething that I can't fearTo be a part ofThe story - It belongs to you

Something you said wasAbout the pen and the paperYou can always write itIt is something you'll have to doGathering stories

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A beautifully-adapted novel, Cameron Crowe, and Jonsi as a composer. And all in one movie! It's a film buff's dream.

I have found that the best kinds of films do not depend on the talent of actors or directors, but on the musical score that it is set to. How lovely it is, when music is so aptly woven into the script and scenes that it becomes a character of its own. This is music that makes your soul soar, the kind of music that leaves you breathless.    

Untouched

'There's a whole commotion going on inside us.' 

'That's bad?'

'It's bad if we want to know what's going on outside ourselves.' 

'Don't we have eyes & ears for that?' 

'They're okay most of the time. But sometimes they get in the way. The earth is speaking to us, but we can't hear because of all the racket our senses are making. Sometimes we need to erase them, erase our senses. Then - maybe - the earth will touch us. The universe will speak. The stars will whisper.'

Stargirl

Jerry Spinelli